Our kids are growing up in a world where everything can be seen, shared, praised, and criticized. Image is everything. When I was younger, I never could have imagined a world where life is on display like it is today. There used to be a quietness growing up, space to figure things out with a few .
That way of life is gone.
Raising kids today often feels like an impossible task. They are growing up in a world where their every move, choice, or flaw can make them fodder for social media. Many moms I talk with to help their kids build an identity that can sustain attacks.
And as a parent, that responsibility can feel overwhelming.
Matt and I have been married for 25 years. We dealt with our own share of scrutiny and public opinion throughout his career in professional baseball. We grew together, rooted in our faith, and learned to navigate the often harsh world of sports commentary.
But now, our two oldest boys, Jackson and Ethan, are on those same fields, playing in those same stadiums. They have the eyes of the fans, and what feels like the world, on them constantly.
When they have a bad day, it feels like everybody has an opinion about their worth. Scrutiny comes with the territory, as my boys are professional athletes. But as moms, we arent called to make their lives easier; were called to prepare them for the difficult seasons.
Consider Marys example as a mother. Talk about raising a child who would be publicly watched, misunderstood, and criticized. From the very beginning, her story didnt fit neatly into peoples expectations. And as Jesus grew, the tension only increased. People questioned Him. Misunderstood Him. Eventually, they rejected Him.
Mary couldnt shield Jesus from public criticism. She couldnt control how people responded to Him. She couldnt stop the hard parts of His story. And Mary had a front-row seat to all of it. But she stayed rooted. She stayed present. She was joyful. She trusted God with the boy who became a man right before her eyes. And that feels familiar.
Because we dont raise strong, grounded kids by removing pressure. We raise them by helping them learn how to stand in it.
And maybe, in a world that watches everything, the most powerful thing we can do as is this: Create a home where our kids know they are seen for who they are â not for how they perform. A place where they dont have to earn love. Where they can bring both their wins and their struggles. Where they know that when the noise of the world gets loud, they still have a place that is steady.
Drawing from scripture, Marys life and my own experience, Id like to offer a few specific principles to help moms raise resilient, faithful kids in todays world.
Lead with grace, even when you need to correct your kids
In Genesis, Adam and Eve are afraid. Theyre ashamed. And they know they will face consequences for their sin. But God doesnt start by sending them away. He meets them in the garden and, in their shame, speaks to them in love.
One way weve modeled this in our home is by eliminating timeouts. We couldnt expect our children to understand Gods patient love for them if we modeled it by sending them to a corner when they disobeyed or didn’t listen. We lead with grace, even when correction is necessary â maybe even more so when correction is necessary.
The freedom of forgiveness is one of the most important things we gain as children of God. We cant share it with our kids until we understand grace, forgiveness, and Gods mercy as true every day for ourselves and let them shape our lives. I didnt do it right all the time, of course. But I didnt have to. I was able to ask God for forgiveness. I was also able to talk to my kids about forgiveness and model it.
Perfection has never been a requirement in our home, and Id encourage you not to make it one in yours. You have to show your kids that they wont be right all the time and that